photo:jetheriot
THE OPPOSITE OF STRESS BALL
(CAPITALIZED words indicate that the stress ball should be either SQUEEZED or UNSQUEEZED, as indicated.)
SCENE 1:
(Hand holds a soccer ball stress ball.)
Stress balls are SQUISHY toys you hold in the palm of your hand. The idea is that they’re helpful for relieving stress, that SQUEEZING them REPEATEDLY is CALMING. Problem is, they don’t work. In fact, they do the exact opposite of what they claim to do.
Stress balls are also known as SQUEEZE balls or RELAXABLE balls. All of these terms – STRESS, SQUEEZE, RELAXABLE – refer to the compressible nature of the ball. A stress ball is an object that can assume both a STRESSED and an UNSTRESSED state. It needn’t be spherical…
SCENE 2:
(Hand holds a football stress ball and squeezes it once.)
…but it must be COMPRESSIBLE.
(Begin squeezing.)
It must be made of a SQUEEZABLE material, a RESILIENT polymer or foam that can RETAIN its shape even after MULTIPLE compressions.
(Stop squeezing.)
A typical stress ball can be COMPRESSED to half its UNSTRESSED size when the fingers of the hand close around it and SQUEEZE. And the stress ball RELAXES to assume its original form, ready to be squeezed again. To be made TENSE and to RELAX, OVER and OVER and OVER, that is the ESSENCE of the stress ball. You’ll hear various theories about why they should work.
(Begin squeezing.)
They stimulate the hand’s nerve endings in an acupunctural manner, sending positive flows of energy to your brain, whatever that means. Others say squeezing a stress ball increases your circulation, boosting your brain’s oxygen levels, whatever that means. And on an intuitive level, the idea is compelling. Squeeze it hard enough and long enough, the stress ball promises, and stress will melt away. But these common sense intuitions, however, aren’t backed up by any evidence.
(Stop squeezing.)
SCENE 3:
(The hand holds a baseball stress ball.)
As far as science is concerned, a stress ball is nothing more than a SPONGY bauble, useful perhaps for strengthening hand muscles, or as an entertaining projectile, but not for alleviating stress. The stress ball, in the way that it’s most commonly understood, actually promotes stress. Yet the stress ball is touted in corporate handbooks worldwide and too many internet articles to count as a sort of remedy for stress. We’ve accepted the idea unthinkingly. How did we get it so wrong?
Let’s start from scratch. The concept of STRESS, in its most modern sense, was taken from the fields of materials engineering. Before the word STRESS was used to describe humans, it was used to describe the way a deformable object redistributes its internal forces in response to external forces acting upon it. Is the object resilient?
(The hand squeezes a baseball stress ball.)
Does it bend?
(The hand squeezes a blob of clay.)
Does it break?
(The hand squeezes an egg and cracks it.)
The term seems tailor-made for human physiology and human psychology. When external forces act on people, some go with the flow.
(The hand squeezes a baseball stress ball.)
Some get bent out of shape.
(The hand squeezes a blob of clay.)
Others crack.
(The hand squeezes an egg and cracks it.)
SCENE 4:
(The hand holds a baseball stress ball and begins squeezing it repeatedly.)
It isn’t always a bad thing to be stressed. When we need to run away from danger, we kick into high gear. It’s good to be able to send blood surging through your body when you need it in a hurry. It’s good to be able to get your mind and your legs racing. These are all good responses to stress. But when you can’t turn it off, when you’re in high gear all the time, you run yourself ragged.
SCENE 5:
(Left hand holds smiley face stress ball.)
The human body is like a stress ball. It can exist in a STRESSED or an UNSTRESSED state. When you’re stressed . . .
(Squeeze ball repeatedly.)
. . . your body is tense. The muscles of your face and your neck are squeezed tight. You crackle with energy and scattered movement. You’re pacing, biting your fingernails, tossing and turning, smacking gum, grinding teeth. Your heart is beating fast. When you’re UNSTRESSED . . .
(Unsqueeze ball and leave unsqueezed.)
. . . your limbs are relaxed. The heart is humming smoothly. The body is serene. If there is movement, it is gentle and purposeful
(Curl fingers thoughtfully around ball, cupping the ball in an elegant hand display.)
The human mind is also like a stress ball. It can exist in a STRESSED or an UNSTRESSED state. When you’re STRESSED . . .
(Squeeze ball repeatedly.)
. . . your mind is buzzing with movement, movement for the sake of movement. You worry. You chew on thoughts. Your mind races from topic to topic. You spin your wheels, failing to gain traction.
(Stop squeezing.)
Stress is a state of both body and mind. The two go hand in hand. You don’t have to do anything and stress will find you. All you have to do is be alive. Traffic. STRESS. Money. STRESS. Job. STRESS. Family. STRESS. Illness. STRESS. Life is a series of STRESSES. Over time, they take a toll on the mind and the body. Stress just happens. You can’t escape it, so it’s important to provide a counterbalance to it. Life keeps SQUEEZING you, and you unless you keep UNSQUEEZING yourself, STRESS will come to predominate. You have to keep UNSQUEEZING yourself over and over and over. This is how peacefulness is achieved. Notice that this is exactly the opposite of what a stress ball would have you do. Stress balls actually lure you toward a state of stress. They’re chewy with the promise of sponginess. They’re colorful. They’re hand-sized. They’re extremely seductive. They practically beg you to squeeze them. The stress ball wants you to SQUEEZE. Peacefulness is about UNSQUEEZING.
SCENE 6:
(Smiley face stress ball disappears from hand as if by magic.)
The stress ball wants you to SQUEEZE. Peacefulness is about UNSQUEEZING. If you want to be UNSTRESSED, why would you COMPRESS (Start squeezing empty hand repeatedly.) yourself repeatedly around a ball? Why would you SQUEEZE when you’re trying to UNSQUEEZE?
(Hand holds smiley face stress ball.)
Trongpa Rinpoche, explaining how karma works, wrote “If you plant PEACHES . . .
(Squeeze ball.)
. . . you get PEACHES.
(Empty hand, squeezing.)
If you plant PEARS . . .
(Unsqueeze ball.)
. . . you get PEARS.”
(Empty hand,unsqueezing.)
PEARS. To become less stressed, you have practice a countermaneuver in the opposite direction.
SCENE 7:
(Begin video echo of empty hand, unsqueezing.)
The mind is inseparable from the body, so the mind will follow where the body leads it. When the body is brought to a state of relaxation, the mind follows. Think about what happens when, for example, you get a massage. The body is relaxed through the manipulation of muscles, then the mind tags along for the ride. Before you know it, the mind is also relaxed. Think about what happens when you step into a bubble bath. You surrender your tensions to the soothing broth and your mind soon takes on the same flavor. If you bring your body to a state of UNSTRESS, you also UNSTRESS your mind.
(End video echo of empty hand, unsqueezing.)
SCENE 8:
(Hand holds smiley face stress ball.)
Somewhere along the way, we got the instructions backward. If your goal is to alleviate stress, SQUEEZING a stress ball accomplishes the exact opposite. Instead of practicing SQUEEZING, you should be practicing UNSQUEEZING. That doesn’t mean you should throw your stress balls away. You just have to use them in a new way. What if, instead of SQUEEZING a stress ball, you REFRAINED from squeezing it? What if you carried it around and practiced RESISTING the temptation to SQUEEZE it? Put it on your desk at work. Put it on your nighstand. Instead of COMPRESSING it, practice emulating it. Tantric practitioners in ancient India were known to contemplate statues of gods and goddesses for hours, even days on end until they had incorporated somehow an essence of the god or goddess into their being. Do this with the stress ball. Become more like the stress ball, the UNSTRESSED stress ball, that is. Hold it in your hand. Resist squeezing it. Feel its light round touch on your palm. Be as buoyant and as resilient as the stress ball. Practice this over and over.
SCENE 9:
(Hand holds a basketball stress ball.)
Humans always want to be DOING something. Reducing stress is more about UNDOING than it is about DOING. It’s more about UNSQUEEZING than SQUEEZING. The stress ball, at least as it has traditionally been used, plays right into our hands’ desires to DO something, to SQUEEZE something. Instead of yielding to this temptation to SQUEEZE, we should be learning to REFRAIN from squeezing until, over time, it becomes second nature. Make this your resolution for the year. It takes less than a second and you can do it anywhere, anytime. Simply notice the state of your body. Notice how you are a living, breathing stress ball. Ask yourself if your body is in a STRESSED or an UNSTRESSED state. If your body is STRESSED, simply unsqueeze yourself. Unsqueeze your muscles, and allow your mind to follow their lead. It doesn’t seem like a lot, but if you do one of these countermaneuvers every day, by the end of the year, you will have done it 365 times. If you have a spare second, try it twice a day. When you’re stopped in traffic, instead of fidgeting with a radio that never delivers the satisfaction you’re looking for, loosen your fingers from the knob, relax the muscles of your neck and shoulder. Let your shoulders fall by your side with a cushiony lightness. Be the unsqueezed foam of the ball. When you’re standing in a long line, instead of BOUNCING and FIDGETING or SURFING the web on your phone, use the opportunity to stand still and RELAX. Be the unsqueezed foam of the ball. When you’re waiting for an elevator, instead of PRESSING the already pressed button repeatedly, use the opportunity to stand still for a moment. Put your hands in your pocket and relax. Be the unsqueezed foam of the ball.